Real Movie Review-Movie Reviews, Movie Quotes, Movie Trivia

Director: Mark Waters

Starring: Freddie Highmore, Mary-Louise Parker, Sarah Bolger, David Strathairn, Seth Rogen, Martin Short

The massive success of the Harry Potter movies mean that studios will be scrambling to turn every piece of adolescent fantasy literature into a film trilogy, as soon as possible. Thus, enters the Spiderwick Chronicles based on a series of books by Holly Black and Tony DiTerlizzi. Director Mark Waters, of Mean Girls fame, does what he can with a formulaic and predictable story set in yet another world where fantastic creatures abound, but humans can’t see them. The visual effects were either rather poor, or trying not to scare their little viewers, but judging by the high level of violence that the film has, I would bet on the latter. The acting is pretty good, including young Freddie Highmore (August Rush) who plays twins.

Recently separated Helen Grace (Mary-Louise Parker), brings her daughter Mallory (Sarah Bolger), and twin boys, Jared and Simon (both played by Freddie Highmore), out to the country, where Helen has conveniently just inherited a grand old mansion. That happens a lot in Hollywood, though I can’t say that I have ever known anyone to inherit a mansion and no money, but anyway, they inherit this house and almost immediately strange poltergeist-type things start happening. Soon enough we find that the cause of these things is a weird little elf-like guy named Thumbletack (voiced by Martin Short) and his concern is over a book written by former home owner, Arthur Spiderwick (David Strathairn). It turns out he has written a guide to all the amazing and magical creatures that live invisibly among us, and this is a pretty important book, so some nasty creatures want to get it.

This is mediocre family fare that some parents may find to be inappropriately violent for younger viewers and borderline boring for their adult escorts. It is cut from the same cloth as things like Stardust and The Golden Compass, but this genre has been overdone lately and has been done better than this.

Director: Zach Helm

Starring: Natalie Portman, Dustin Hoffman, Jason Bateman, Zach Mills

First time director Zach Helm, starts out with his own script and a small, but talented, cast in his attempt to make a light and amusing, offbeat family fantasy film about a magical toy store. Hoffman shines, with the help of his cast mates, but the store, and the story, doesn’t quite manage to impart the sense of wonder that it was going for. More excitement was needed for this imaginative tale to really sparkle.

Molly Mahoney (Natalie Portman) is the manager of an amazing toy store, through which magic flows like a breeze, apparently because of its vibrant and 243 year old owner, Edward Magorium, (Dustin Hoffman)but change is in the air. Molly feels that she should find a more serious job, and Mr. Magorium is interested in preparing his store to be passed on. For this reason, he hires a dry accountant named Henry (Jason Bateman) to put the business in proper administrative order. Watching all this is Eric, a hat-collecting nine-year-old, who seems to be part of the store in some unclear fashion. Meanwhile, the living, breathing store doesn’t seem too pleased about all this upheaval and begins to act up.

Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium plays like a second rate version of Charlie and The Chocolate Factory, which was, itself a second rate version of the 1971 original. This film, however, never manages to step out from the recent crowd of family-orientated fantasy films to establish itself as a memorable, potential classic, but instead presents us with a mildly entertaining 93 minute distraction.

Director: Matthew Vaughn

Starring: Charlie Cox, Claire Danes, Michelle Pfeiffer, Kate Magowan, Robert De Niro, Mark Strong, Sienna Miller, Peter O’Toole

Director Matthew Vaughn does a fine job with his second feature (his first was the tricky crime drama, Layer Cake), which is a family fantasy fairy tale-style project based on Neil Gaiman’s novel. The premise is rather silly, even for a feature of this sort, but Jane Goldman’s script is good enough to hold interest and give the talented cast enough to work with. The result is an energetic, feel-good, film that should be enjoyed by all ages, though a few scenes might be a bit frightening for young viewers.

Wall is a British village that is notable for its proximity to a wall that is mysteriously guarded, and for good reason, since it leads to a special, magical world. Young Tristan (Charlie Cox) boldly crosses to this world to retrieve a shooting star to prove his love to the village beauty (Sienna Miller), but when he finds the location of the star, he finds not a meteor, but a mysterious, beautiful girl played by Claire Danes. Soon, it becomes clear that everyone wants to capture this celestial visitor, including a witch, played wonderfully by Michelle Pfeiffer and the Princes of the kingdom. Look for De Niro in a different role as a flying pirate and Ricky Gervais in a small role.

This was a pleasant movie that is slightly reminiscent of The Princess Bride, though with far higher production values and a slightly more serious tone. The performances are fantastic, particularly by Pfeiffer and Danes. Sometimes Cox seems overwhelmed by all the talent around him, but he still does well enough. The overall result is a pleasing addition to the family movie library.

Director: Chris Weitz

Starring: Dakota Blue Richards, Nicole Kidman, Daniel Craig, Ben Walker, Ian McKellan, Eva Green, Ian McShane, Sam Elliott, Jim Carter, Freddie Highmore

Chris Weitz, who is more familiar with comedies, (like American Pie, which he produced) wrote this screenplay from Phillip Pullman’s popular novel, and then took an unfamiliar position at the directorial helm for this imaginative and fantastically, visual epic. The story, here, feels rushed with too many characters to have any real development and many of them mechanically spill out long back stories. This throws a lot at the viewers, who, like myself, haven’t read the books. I caught some of it, but, since I didn’t give it an exam-cramming effort, all the details here didn’t quite stick. The acting is generally good, but does let down in spots, but the CGI is as impressive as any that I’ve seen.

Dakota Blue Richards is Lyra, a spirited, and imaginative, girl, who finds that she has an important role to play on the alternate universe Earth, where the story takes place. On this world, an evil power structure called the Magisterium, is kidnapping children to properly educate them to be obedient little serfs. The key to defeating this dangerous institution, is a magical, truth-revealing golden compass which Lyra is destined to use. Thus equipped, she joins with numerous allies, including Sam Elliott who is in a familiar role as some kind of old west talking, sky cowboy, and Ian McKellan as the voice of a giant, armored Ice Bear, as she travels north to find and rescue the children.

The marketing machine was in full production when they fired this one out at the Christmas rush, and plastered in our faces everywhere we look, in hopes that they would get the gift of a giant opening weekend. There’s great CGI, but the end result is a mediocre film. I still pick Stardust as the year’s best family/fantasy feature.

Director: Robert Zemeckis

Starring: Ray Winstone, Robin Wright Penn, Angelina Jolie, Anthony Hopkins, John Malkovich, Brendan Gleeson

Director Robert Zemeckis has taken one of western culture’s oldest tales, Beowulf (dating back to before 1000 AD), and applied one of the newest and most technologically advanced film making techniques to this classical epic poem. “Enhanced motion capture” is supposed to be halfway between animation and live action. Zemeckis first employed this system in 2004 with Polar Express, but the technology has improved since that feature. The result, this time out, is a visually stunning epic with some very impressive CGI scenes of monsters and landscapes. The system is still less impressive when it tries to digitize the actors, however. Though, wonderfully detailed, the animation in the human action scenes is often pretty obvious. The strange end product closely resembles a very good cut scene from a video game. Today, when video games are trying to look as close to movies as they can, here we have a movie that seems to be trying to look like a video game. Why? I know, I know. It’s cheaper. I still had to pay full price to see it, though. Anyway, despite the fact that I haven’t been won over by this style, this is a good movie. It is a simple heroic tale with some good action scenes, including one of the best dragons ever put on film.

Little-known Ray Winstone landed the title role here as the legendary hero, Beowulf (though his appearance has been replaced thrugh CGI), who comes to rid a kingdom of its troublesome monster (and undoubtedly one of the worst party crashers ever!), Grendel. Beowulf is a little more shaken when he confronts the creature’s mother, however. She is played by Angelina Jolie (looking amazing, but they gave her character some crazy-looking built-in high heels) and this encounter requires a different approach. Most importantly, he keeps his clothes on (or does he?), which he didn’t when fighting her son – hmmm, that seems a little mixed up. However, he does bring peace to the region, and so when the area’s ruler (Anthony Hopkins) dies, soon after, Beowulf becomes King. However it seems that in lifting the darkness from the land, he placed it upon himself. There is a price to be paid….

Imagine 300 meeting The 13th Warrior (also loosely based on Beowulf) and you will have some idea of what to expect here. There’s lots for action fans to enjoy, and techno junkies will love this new frontier of CGI film work. If you disliked both of the features mentioned above, then this one is probably not for you.

Director: Kevin Munroe

Starring: Mikey Kelley, Sarah Micelle Gellar, Mako, Patrick Stewart,
Mitchell Whitfield, James Arnold Taylor, Nolan North, Laurence Fishburne,

The rental box for this piece of crap should be stamped with a large warning label: ‘For Children Only. May cause vomiting and suicidal thoughts for adults’. Except, of course, that the film’s violence has earned it a PG rating, so I’m not sure if parents would choose this for their kids, either. Well, the Turtles are back in a movie that looks so much like a video game that all it needs is the Sony PS3 logo. The acting is fine with such names as Patrick Stewart as villain, Max Winters and Laurence Fishburne as the narrator. The story is kindergarten simple and the dialog is on a par with the most mediocre Saturday morning efforts. There is less action that you would expect to find and the jokes don’t work. So what’s left?

The film starts with a 3,000-year-old back-story that ends with 13 monsters being released into the world. Meanwhile, old turtle friend April O’Neil sets out to find Leonardo who has been training alone in Central America. She convinces him to return to his family, which has been floundering in his absence. Isn’t the profound wisdom of Master Splinter enough to keep these guys on track? Anyways, he does return and after a bunch of squabbling, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles get back down to the business of making money- I mean fighting evil.

I can only guess that this mass marketing machine that lead off with a movie is aimed at youngsters and maybe at those who enjoyed the cartoons, movies and games from the last time these four were set upon the wallets of impressionable children and their helpless parents. There is nothing new to offer, here and what is re-hashed wasn’t interesting the first twenty times we saw it in movies exactly like this one.

The Last Legion (2007) **
Director: Doug Lefler

Starring: Colin Firth, Ben Kingsley, Aishwarya Rai, Thomas Sangster, Peter Mullan, Kevin McKidd,

I hate to think that this is the best role that Ben Kingsley is being offered these days. This rather disappointing effort reminded me of Eragon as another fantasy film that has translated poorly from its literary roots because of a poor script. While better than Eragon, which was a complete wreck of a movie, this one teeters between poor and mediocre. It features pretty good fight scenes, though some will be disappointed by the complete absence of gore, but its story is a muddled mix of Arthurian legend and Roman history. The characters are wooden and the dialog is stale and unimaginative. There is an out-of-place add-on romantic subplot and the acting, even from the experienced names, ranges from poor to average.

Young Thomas Sangster plays Romulus Augustus Caesar, the young heir to the throne of the Roman Empire, who soon finds himself on the run with a handful of supporters, when his empire is snatched by an ugly and evil army of Goths. His surviving guard is led by Aurelius (Colin Firth), who is joined by the boy’s teacher, a mysterious traveler named Ambrosinus (Kingsley) and a curious warrior played by Aishwarya Rai, a well-known Asian star in what appears to be her first North American film appearance as the best chick with a blade since Kill Bill.

There are undiscriminating fans of this genre that will enjoy this film. They go in with few expectations of story or original well-constructed characters. Many of them will be disappointed in the lack of effects and low budget production values and will not be won over. As for the rest of us, this is just another release hoping to cash in on new fantasy fans created by the Lord of the Rings Trilogy that will be on video before you know it and forgotten soon after.

Director: David Yates

Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, Gary Oldman, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint, Imelda Staunton, Michael Gambon, Matthew Lewis, Evanna Lynch.

It’s here! It’s here! With the long awaited book #7 on the verge of release, Harry Potter mania was at frenzy level when this movie, based on book #5 was released. It may be the adolescent girl in me, but I am a Potter fan. I have read all the books (okay, okay, yes, more than once) and book 5 is my favorite, so my expectations may have been a tad high going into this one, but this is the weakest of the Potter movie efforts, thus far. Although, still an enjoyable film, the editor’s knife was a little sharp here. Although, it is already just over two hours, this is the longest Potter book and has been made into the shortest Potter movie. The result, in some spots, are short, almost choppy scenes that seem more suited to the trailer than the main feature. If Yates had put in another half hour or so, this effect may have been eliminated. The story is good, however, and the young cast is improving. The effects are good but also missing are the slow tacking shots that gave Hogwarts much of its wonder.

Harry, Hermione and Ron are all back and times at Hogwarts are hard. The Ministry For Magic is denying the return of evil incarnate, Lord Voldemort, and is out to discredit both Harry and Dumbledore who is played by Michael Gambon, like he has never read the Potter books. The Adult characters have formed a secret society (The Order of The Phoenix) to combat Voldemort’s followers, the Death Eaters, while Harry and friends prepare to defend themselves in these dangerous times, and battle against the new ministry-approved (and anti-Harry and Dumbledore), Hogwarts presence, Delores Umbridge (played very well by Staunton), by forming a secret defense against the dark arts club. The characters are getting older and teenage romance is here, as well. it is in these areas that Yates seemed to want to save the most time, and his method is the use of montages and short, quickly cut scenes. This hurts the end product, but it is difficult for me to gauge how this affects non-Potter readers’ ability to follow the story.

Potter fans will support this film, of course, and enjoy seeing another book brought to life on the big screen. The story here is darker and more about conflict than mystery. The growing numbers of characters compete for screen time, but it’s still an entry in a top-notch fantasy adventure series. I’m sure that many of the legions of Potter fans will take issue with any criticism and I certainly have been critical here. This is still a good movie. I just can’t help thinking how much better it could have been.

Director: Robert Shaye

Starring: Chris O’Neil, Rhiannon Leigh Wryn, Joely Richardson, Timothy Hutton, Rainn Wilson, Kathryn Hahn, Michael Clarke Duncan

The Last Mimzy is a slow moving, overly complex attempt at an E.T. style family drama that somehow ended up with a PG rating. The acting is fine, with the two young leads doing a good job, but the story unfolds slowly and never manages to generate enough tension or humour (there is really no humor that I recall) to hold the viewer’s attention as it does so. There is nothing to draw this effort out of the crowd of films striving for the family film buck

Noah and Emma Wilder are a young brother and sister (Neil and Wryn) who find a mysterious box during a family beach outing. Items in the box soon show themselves to have (and give) abilities to the youngsters, as their parents (Richardson and Hutton) gradually grow concerned. They are not alone in taking note of these changes. Noah’s science teacher, (Wilson) along with his Tibetan Buddhist fiancée (Hahn) get involved, as well as government forces led by Nathaniel Broadman (Clarke). As you may have guessed, having this many characters any real character development and focusing on fewer characters with better dialogue would have improved this film.

If you took Phenomenon and crossed it with E.T., that would give you some idea what to expect here, but without a tighter script it is not worth renting unless one of your kids is holding the box and looking at you like the waterworks are about to start. This movie is so mediocre that I had to struggle to remember it long enough to write a review.

Director: Bryan Singer

Starring: Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, Ian McKellen, Halle Berry, Famke Janssen, James Marsden, Anna Paquin, Rebecca Romijan, Brian Cox, Alan Cumming, Shawn Ashmore, Aaron Stanford

This is a fantastic follow up that even outdoes the first film, which was a pretty good action film in its own right. All of the cast is back and are joined by Alan Cumming as the Nightcrawler. The talented cast all give credible performances and the story is just as strong. The advantage that this film had was more time available to develop characters who were introduced, but underdeveloped in the introductory film. Bryan Singer is back as director and does an admirable job at balancing action and story.

The film starts with Magneto (McKellen) suffering horrible treatment in a special glass prison by an unscrupulous military scientist, William Stryker (Cox), who wants to know everything about Mutants in general and Professor Xavier’s (Stewart) school in particular. The government attitude toward Mutants takes a nasty turn when one tries to kill the president and soon everyone is scrambling for answers and safety. Jean Gray’s character (Janssen) has more to do here, as do Iceman and Pyro (Ashmore and Stanford). Jackman’s body is exploding with his Wolverine muscles and Jackman does a good job playing his character who is always on the edge of explosion, himself.

This is an enjoyable fantasy/action movie that keeps a solid story moving steadily, while keeping away from one-dimensional characters and offering an observation about the choices that human beings make. If you liked the first one, this sequel will not disappoint. If you didn’t, then this release is unlikely to change your mind.