Real Movie Review-Movie Reviews, Movie Quotes, Movie Trivia

Wanted – movie quotes:
“Your father died yesterday in the rooftop of the Metropolitan Building. He was one of the greatest assassins who ever lived. And the other one is behind you.”

“Welcome… to the Fraternity. This gun you’re holding belonged to your father, he could conduct a symphony orchestra with it.” MMM – I wish he had, that probably would have been more interesting to watch.

Movie lines from Wanted

Director: Timur Bekmambetov

Starring: James McAvoy, Angelina Jolie, Morgan Freeman, Terence Stamp, Thomas Kretschmann, Kristen Hager, Chris Pratt

Well, the summer action season is here, and along with it, the promise of three months of high octane, low-intel action explosions that plug their gaping plot holes with expensive CGI and Dolby surround sound. Wanted made its way to the big screen as a comic book series, which explains the nonsensical plot and overdone action sequences which are becoming the all too typical style of today’s action features, and the end result is a yawning formula film.

James McAvoy’s character, Wesley starts out as a discontented office worker – aka Ed Norton’s Fight Club character, but his life takes a turn to the exciting when he is thrust into the midst of a violent war within a secret thousand year old fraternity of assassins, to which it turns out he was born to be part of. His sexy, but unconvincingly scrawny guide into this world is Fox, played by Angelina Jolie, who mostly just poses for the camera between comic book battles. Morgan Freeman is Sloan, the fraternity leader who monitors Wesley’s progress to determine when he is ready for his very special mission. The story strains credibility, but does manage a couple of decent surprises.

The action scenes of Wanted will remind viewers of pictures like Jumper mixed with Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Jumper at least had an original premise but the ancient secret society of assassins is not original enough to carry this feature, but it should still pack enough punches and bullets to keep the action crowd happy for a couple of hours.

The Incredible Hulk – movie quotes:
“Don’t make me angry. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.”

“As far as I’m concerned that man’s whole body is property of the US Army.”

Movie lines from The Incredible Hulk

Director: Louis LeTerrier

Starring: Edward Norton, Liv Tyler, William Hurt, Tim Roth, Tim Blake Nelson,

Marvel is back up on the silver screen, and the formula of Spider-man/Ironman, etc., is in clear view. That’s not a bad thing, but it doesn’t work as well for novice director, Louis LeTerrier. True, he has the uber-talented Ed Norton to work with, but he is also saddled with what is without a doubt, one of comicdom’s most boring superheroes. The Hulk has limited power of speech, ruling out the snappy patter in the midst of battle, and his ability, which is simply being big, really strong and indestructible leaves his battles looking like a locker room scrap at the Mr. Universe competition. That being said, this is still a decent chase film and LeTerrier shows great pacing instincts for getting the action in, just as things start to lag, and slowing it down when it starts to get repetitive. That judgment was sadly lacking in the 2003 Ang Lee Hulk disaster. The CGI here is a little underwhelming, and the characters and script needed more zip, but this is still a solid action effort.

Ed Norton is Bruce Banner, who is on the run in South America, where he is trying to stay hidden from his single-minded nemesis, Col Ross, control his temper (I like the days without incident angle), and find a cure for his condition. This plan blows to pieces with one little accident and soon Banner finds himself back on the run, pursued by Ross and his aging super soldier, Emil (Tim Roth, looking unconvincing in the role, but what the hell, I like Tim Roth). Along the way, he meets his old flame, Betty (Liv Tyler) and experiences a big reduction in his days without incident number. You can guess where its all going, but getting there is a pretty fun ride, and it even features a cameo by original on-screen hulkster Lou Ferrigno, who also provided the monster‘s voice.

Don’t make me bored. You wouldn’t like me when I’m bored. Luckily, The Incredible Hulk didn’t make me bored, so it is saved from the scathing power of my keyboard. Norton is great, and this film plays like Ironman mixed with The Fugitive, though lacks the sharp dialog of both and Ironman’s lighter, fun moments. Fans of the green smashing machine will find this a more satisfying big screen treatment, and those who think comics should be restricted to Saturday morning papers will still find this film to be palatable enough.

The Happening – movie quotes:
“There are forces at work that are beyond our understanding.” MMM – Where? Here or in Hollywood? Do me a favour, next time you make a movie about things that are beyond my understanding (sure, like THAT’S hard), try to explain it to me, anyway.
Movie lines from The Happening

Director: M. Night Shyamalan

Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Zooey Deschanel, John Leguizamo, Ashlyn Sanchez, Betty Buckley.

Writer/director M. Night Shyamalan seems to have unfortunately become the Hollywood version of a brilliant rookie of the year winner, who slips into obscure mediocrity after. The Sixth Sense, his early masterpiece shot him to a level of prominence that he has been sadly unable to maintain. The Happening is ironically titled, since after the big hook at the beginning and some early developments, nothing happens. Shyamalan, who showed the courage to make a subtle, slow-paced film with Unbreakable, which I enjoyed a great deal, takes that tact here, as well, but he just does not give us enough. We learn little more about the either the phenomenon, or the characters that it is affecting after the first half hour. The story premise is imaginative, but seems like it was not sufficiently developed. The acting is pretty good, but sometimes the script has character actions that seem silly and forced, as it limps along to a fizzle of an ending.

Mark Wahlberg is Elliott, a calm, NYC high school teacher, who finds himself fleeing the Big Apple after people start dying (or killing themselves to be more accurate) in Central Park, and the strange psychological phenomenon starts popping up all over the city. He is accompanied by his wife, Alma (Zooey Deschanel), his friend, Julian (John Leguizamo), and Julian’s 8 year old daughter (how many times are we told that she‘s only 8?), Jess. As they and masses of others try to escape the city, they learn that the strange, lethal event is popping up all over the American northeast. What can they do? Where can they go? What is causing this?

The Happening has a great premise that seems like it was never properly finished, and a hasty script that feels lazy and slow, take what had the promise to be an interesting movie and turn it into a napping opportunity for insomniacs. There is an admirable theme of environmental respect, but its just not enough. We want something to happen, to watch this imaginative scenario unfold and be filled with dread, or wonder, or something. I guess I did get filled with wonder. I left wondering how a half-finished movie like this gets made.

You Don’t Mess With The Zohan – movie quotes:
“You’re like Rembrandt with a grenade.”
“I feel no pain. I’ve told you this in other fights.”
Movie lines from You Don’t Mess With The Zohan

Director: Dennis Dugan

Starring: Adam Sandler, John Turturro, Emmanuelle Chriqui

Adam Sandler co-wrote this explosion of muddled accents, weak characters and occasional humor, as he tries to make us laugh and give some kind of light plea for peace in the middle east. Fine supporting actor John Turturro seems a little lost here and Sandler plays a softer, gentler version of his stock leading man, but the comedy is pure Happy Madison slapstick.

Adam Sandler is a Mossad agent/super hero who makes James Bond look like Maxwell Smart. He fakes his own death to get out of the game so he can pursue his real dream of becoming a hairstylist in New York. There, his specialty of….ummm charming elderly women and offering much more in depth service than cutting and styling their hair. It’s silly and an overdone gag and is added to an evil landlord trying to force his boss, played by Emmanuelle Chriqui (a veteran of over a decade’s worth of work that you have probably never heard of ,and high on FHM’s 2008 list of sexiest women) to move. Things get more active when a trio of goofy terrorists recognize him, and when it turns out that the nemesis of his past life, The Phantom, (played by John Turturro) is also in New York. If it sounds like alot going on, it is, but it all leads to a gentle but awkward ending with a sentiment that’s easy to agree with.

You Don’t Mess With The Zohan is cinematic evidence that Adam Sandler is growing up…sort of. The humor is juvenile, but intermittently funny, and the writing is rough but the script shows a social conscience. Like most of Sandler’s efforts the story is weak, but filled with funny scenes of various effectiveness, that should please his fans, but probably won’t win him any new ones.

Unbreakable – movie quotes:


“…to answer your question, there are two reasons why I’m looking at you like this. One because it seems in a few minutes you will officially be the only survivor of this train wreck, and two, because you didn’t break one bone. You don’t have a scratch on you.”

“It appears that your baby has sustained some fractures while inside your uterus… his arms and his legs are broken.”

“They called me Mr. Glass.”

“Friends listen to each other! And they don’t shoot each other, do they Audrey?”
“No shooting friends, Joseph!” – MMM: Now, that’s a good rule to have with your friends. I wish MY friends would stop shooting Me!

Movie lines from Unbreakable

Director: M. Night Shyamalan

Starring: Bruce Willis, Samuel L. Jackson, Robin Wright Penn, Spencer Treat Clark

M. Night Shyamalan burst into the blazing light of movie stardom with his magnificent 1999 thriller, Sixth Sense. Shyamalan’s follow up to that monster hit was this patient, almost plodding, dramatic mystery with a subtle comic book story, and an anti-climatic, but clever ending, that may people found too slow and dark. Shyamalan chooses a dark style with muted colors (even more so than in Sixth Sense) and unusual camera angles to tell this story that seems to have polarized opinions into love it or hate it camps. I love it and still consider to be Shyamalan’s second best work.

Bruce Willis is David Dunn, a subdued stadium security guard with a twelve year old son and marital problems when he finds himself as the unharmed survivor of a massive train wreck. An unfazed David takes this in stride, but soon finds himself approached by an injury prone comic book art dealer named Elijah Price (Samuel L. Jackson) who thinks that David may be the unbreakable opposite to his own incredibly brittle physique. Price keeps popping up with questions to test his theory, as David begins to learn more about himself.

Unbreakable has an original and intriguing story, but many will find the dark lighting and drab colors combines with the low moving script to create an experience akin to a high school history class with soft lighting and a pillow. Shyamalan obviously intended to provide contrast in the same manner as he used red in Sixth Sense, but it’s overdone here and won’t be to everyone’s taste. If, however, you appreciate an understated subtlety that has become increasingly rare in today’s flashy and loud Hollywood features, then Unbreakable will mark a welcome relief.